Cheater Pants

No, this is not like Fat Pants. Though they make "cheater" pants - those ones with the hidden elastic that gives you like two sizes of play in your pants, but have you seen those? They're not exactly fashion forward. Face it, they are for old people and if you ever see me wearing them put me either in a rest home or psychiatric unit cuz I have totally lost it. No, I wanted to blog about diet cheats - those things we do to trick ourselves into believing we are neither hungry nor deprived, though I can say with certainty that we are both. So, here we go:
Morning Coffee: is this just me? Seriously, my morning coffee (Monday - Fri., no weekends) is a diet cheater. Caffeine = thing that makes me feel full AND handy digestive system regulator. What? Too gross for you? Too bad - it's cheaper than colonic and you know it makes a difference on the scale.
Boca Burgers: When jonesing for a big old greasy burger, these can be a good alternative and are very filling. They're vegetarian burgers, yo! But, don't eat them at lunch at work - given that they are made with beans and soy and stuff like that, they may cause innordinate amounts of flatulance. And I'm only a fan when they are on a bun (Earth Grains makes great high fiber burger buns) with mustard, pickle, lettuce, etc. - when plain, they just kinda gross me out.
Hostess 100 cal Cakes: OMG, these are the frickin bomb. See, now you know I am in full diet mode cuz these are NOT the bomb. I mean, Hostess regular cupcakes, Ho Hos, Twinkies, fruit pies - those are rediculously delicious and total garbage in terms of nutrition and fat content. But when not on a diet, I don't tend to give a crap about nutrition and fat content. However, when on a diet (as we have established that WW is), and pining for the days of Hostess gluttony, those 100 cal cupcakes are enough to take the edge off and a good value at 1 point for three tiny cupcakes.
Light Bread and Low/No Fat Bologna: Put these things together and you have a two point sandwich. Two points! I think Sarah Lee makes the best light bread, though D'Italiano also makes a good one. And which one of you whispered "gross" when I mentioned the rubbery-looking bologna? Whatever. It's good.
Spray Butter: It's good on toast - flavor minus calories. The garlic flavor one is also good. You'd think I would list spray salad dressing too, eh?
Fat Free Italian Dressing: I tried the spray dressings, and did not enjoy them. Maybe I need to check out other flavors, but both of the ones that I got were not too tasty. On the other hand FFID (see bold title) IS good - has flavor, etc. And 0 points.
Sugar Free Jello: If you don't know about this one, you have never been on a diet and I do not know why you are reading this blog.
Fat Free/Reduced Fat Cool Whip: see above - sugar free jello explanation
Raw/Unsalted Almonds: What?! Nuts!? Those are fattening, right? Yeah, but good kind of fat, folks. And 7 almonds are worth 1 point and very much take the edge off of those pesky hunger pangs.
Gum: This is one passed on by a friend. And demonstrated by my brother when we went to the movies and he passed up the popcorn, etc., and offered me some gum. I was amazed. Tasted sweet, satisfying, and no greasy fingers. My friend swears it can work in other times of hunger, and I intend to try it out.
Flavor Packets for Water: I love these things! My water is now rasberry lemonade and it's sugar free! And the WalMart brand ones are pretty good too - and cheap as all get out.

Ok, I am sick of typing. Feel free to comment on your favorite diet cheaters. I wish there were cheaters for exercise, too. Sigh.