Camouflage

I have had people be surprised that I wear a size 10, sometimes a 12 (I try to stay away from those brands) depending on the item. Recent guesses have been in the size 6 or 8 range (like my friend who I swore was smoking crack when she said that). Ooh, I wish.

Here's the facts of the matter, I am good at camouflage clothing. I have my mother to thank for this: teaching me the art of playing up your good features and finding stuff that disguises the not-so-ideal parts. These are the same principals found on "What Not to Wear," only I am ok with synthetic fabrics that they hate (sorry Stacy and Clinton, I can't afford cashmere). These rules are simple, but the clothing varies from body to body. I have a wai'st, but have big 'ole thighs and squishy knees. So, I stay away from those blousy tops that get tighter at the hips, drawing eyes down to legs. With my clothes, I am shooting for waist skimmers: "look HERE, not there" kinds of things. Sahm has fantastic legs and struggles with a poochy belly, so those blousy tops make her look like a supermodel. It's a shame we don't share clothing well, though.