If Men Ran Christmas

I really like Christmas. So, before I go off on this little mental trip with you all, please let me acknowledge that I do all of the things that I do for Christmas because I enjoy the whole effect. And it's a lot of work, but I like the outcome and I like that my kids get the experience.

Ok, so that stuff aside, I just put away all of my Christmas decorations and was thinking about all the stuff that comes with Christmas and how much I do. Then I was thinking about how nice it must be to be a man at Christmas. Well, or at least a man married to a woman who puts a lot of effort into Christmas. I mean, really. Warmly decorated home, cards mailed (after the photo is taken, card made and letter written) to all of your friends and family, thoughtful hand-picked gifts wrapped and under the tree in carefully coordinated papers and ribbons, cookies and candies made and arranged on platters, meals planned, kids fed, and then everything cleaned up and put away. All while you sat and drank a beer and maybe made sure the kids didn't kill one another during meal prep and clean-up. That's awesome. I invited my spouse to write the yearly Christmas letter and trade that job off every other year between us. He said, "That'd be fine if you are ok with us sending out cards every other year." Ok, then.

So, what would it look like if men (or, at least, my spouse and brothers-in-laws) ran Christmas? Homes might have Christmas trees. Decorations would otherwise be pretty sparse. My house would have some outside lights. Christmas cookies would be purchased from stores. Few, if any, cards would be sent and no photos would be included. There would be a lot of gift cards under the tree, or a few packages from stores where gift wrapping is offered. Dinner would be some sort of grilled meat and frozen veggies, or spaghetti or pizza. Paper plates may be involved.

I suppose that would be ok. But I like my version better. So, I will refrain from unleashing on my spouse my annoyance, sarcastically reading off the second paragraph from here, ending with a, "Must be nice to have Christmas like when you were a kid and have that CONTINUE into your adult life!!" I will kindly NOT say that, even though there is a part of me that wants to do so. Instead, I will hold on to a smug sense that my kids and my spouse are lucky it is me and not him who is running Christmas around here.