Theme Music from Rocky, Please

I did it! I ran a mile and a third in one stretch without stopping to gulp in air and stretch out the stitch in my side! I ran at snail's pace, but I did it! I pushed away all thoughts of stopping and just kept going. I may just be able to make my goal of running two miles. Will wonders never cease?

Dimples

Dimples are not universally cute. Cute on babies, cavernous on Mario Lopez (and cute), dashing on Michael and Kirk Douglas. Really nasty on my rear end and my gut. Cellulite is horrible!! And it is something that afflicts many many many women, even skinny bitches. I was used to this dimply junk on my upper thighs, but it has developed on my gut and this does not make me happy. So, add that to my list.

Old, Fat and Out of Shape

You all thought I was back to bashing on myself for being disgusting, right?! Oooh, I faked you out! My title is referring to my geriatric dog. Poor thing! I decided to take her out with me to go for a jog, cuz normally she loves to do that. Let me give you the rundown on my dog: she is a Husky/Shephard mut who is 12 years old. She gets little to no exercise in the winter and at any time there is inclement weather, and never misses a meal. She has been prone to stealing bread - chewing a hole in the bag and eating the loaf before going off to hide and give me dejected, guilty looks when I come home. (We now keep the bread in the pantry.) But she really likes to go for walks, and will get excited whenever you say the "w" word and put on your tennis shoes.

Friday evening was no exception, and she was wriggling around in the dance-of-impatience as I put on my shoes. We walked down the block with her walking energetically at my side, and then rounded the corner to walk at a brisk pace for another couple of blocks before I broke into a jog. She loped along beside me for a ways, and then suddenly I noticed that she was behind me and I was having to pull on the leash for her to even keep pace behind me. What the heck?!! Normally she is choking herself on the leash, making terrible-sounding hacking noises because she has strained her windpipe with her collar. So I dropped to a walk for a while then jogged again with the same result. Then I decide to take her old tired self home, so walked and SHE WAS STILL BEHIND ME! She couldn't keep up with a brisk walk! We hit the lawn of the school down the street and she laid down. I thought I was going to have to carry her 50 pounds of furry weight home, but she made it. Slowly. Her poor old legs were twitching when we got home. I joked about it, but I have to say that it made me kind of sad to see the proof of her mortality. My beloved doggie is on the downhill slide. But, I'm still going to take her on walks around the block. I hope someone will do the same for me when I am 87, and not expect me to run a third of a mile.

Back in the Saddle (even if it hurts)

Ok, well I was going to get on my treadmill tonight, but I didn't do it. Thankfully, my coochie-coochie made a full recovery as of Wednesday. My hamstrings and outer thighs, however, have been screaming at me ever since the Ride Run training session. Well, today they are not screaming, more like glaring with the occasional audible grumbling. So, I was going to get on the treadmill tonight, but instead I goofed around on my computer and made the excuse that my legs still hurt. But, like they say, you have to get back up on the horse that threw you, so I am hereby making my commitment to the treadmill tomorrow. OR, if the weather cooperates, I'll run outside for an even more complete training experience. You can all wag a virtual finger at me tomorrow if I don't.

Oh, and does anyone have any good running-songs? I'm going to need more than two, I hope. I have a lot of good walking songs - one being Justin Timberlake's "She Knows" and you get extra bonus points if you can walk to that song and smack your own rear end without breaking stride when he sings, "She looks just like a model, except she's got a little more a**..." My favorite running song so far is "Just Like Heaven" by the Cure.

You Hurt Your What?

My brother has asked if I would like to participate in the "Ride Run" race on the 4th of July. This is a race around a lake, 12 miles in length, and the gist is that you work as a team, one starts out running and one on a bike. Biker drops bike at agreed upon spot and starts running, first runner comes upon bike and gets on, pedaling along past first biker (who is now running) until coming upon the next drop spot, drops bike and starts running...etc. etc. leap-frogging each other in this way all around the lake until you collapse at the finish line. Sounds like fun, eh? Notice that I said "PARTICIPATE" in the race - not "compete." He, very nicely, understands that in no way will I be able to compete with others in this event, even though he would be able to compete and do quite well, I am sure.

So, I am considering it. And I would really like to do this with him, just to say that I did it. So I decided to hit the gym on Tuesday to work on training for this event, because it seems to me I would need to be able to run at least two miles consecutively, and then do some biking, etc. Makes sense that I should go to the gym and practice on the treadmills and exercise bikes, right? Mr. Spock would find that logical, I am thinkin.

I hit the treadmill with my Ipod on my "running" songs, and happily was able to make it through not only one of them, but TWO, consecutively and effectively burned through more than a mile! Yay for me! I walked for a few measured increments, and then back to my jog, doing this for several more intervals - adding up to about 35 minutes on the treadmill. I was planning to go for one last running push, so hit the gas on the treadmill speed and started to run when suddenly a pain shot up my inner left leg up through my groin and straight across my lady parts! It felt like someone kicked me square in the nads, if I had any nads. So, I desperately hit the SLOW DOWN button as fast as I could, like I was telegraphing the fastest message across the wires (imagine furious tapping on the machine) to slow it down to a walk my 16-month-old niece could manage and recovered for a moment, each step producing an odd painful pulsing. Once that subsided I sped the machine up, only to be met with more intense painful pulsing. 'Good grief, I think I broke my cooter,' I thought to myself. Now what? I got on that damn bike, that's what. I managed 15 minutes on that thing, standing on the pedals periodically to reduce the transfer of pain to my ass.

Ride Run. Good idea.

Vices

I have several guilty pleasures in life and a couple of vices. Thankfully I am not a smoker, though I have smoked a clove cigarette or two when drunk. I am not a big drinker, so that makes it extra fun when I decide to drink cuz I get tipsy quickly. My vices would be: spending money and eating unhealthy food. I really do enjoy shopping - not for clothes for myself, mind you (mostly because of vice #2), but for clothes for my kids, stuff for my house, makeup, hair do-dads, food, etc. I just love to be in a retail environment, looking at stuff and loading up my cart. I have a 10-year-old daughter who could be the happy recipient of a large wardrobe if only she liked clothes that aren't sweatpants or oversized tee-shirts. She wrecks my shopping buzz some days, I tell you. But my 5-year-old is as girly as they come, so I have a grand ole time loading her closet. My spouse frowns at me often, but retail therapy is fun.

Eating: no real need for discussion on that one, is there? Peanut butter, chocolate, cake, cookies, doughnuts, cheeseball on crackers, spinach and artichoke dip... the list is endless.

And my latest guilty pleasure: Dancing With The Stars. Seriously, I would not miss it for the world. I love that dorky show! Their outfits are nuts, but I like every cheesey moment. I'm rooting for Christy Yamaguchi this season and tonight will find out the winner!! I'm even considering getting the Dancing with the Stars workout video. I'll let you know if I do and if it is any good.

The Ripple Effect

Sahm has a blog and once wrote about underwear and how bands at the bottom of your skivvies contribute greatly to the formation of cellulite. She learned this from somewhere scientific, like Tyra Banks' show or Rachel Ray. And though it's a little too late to prevent cellulite on my bod, I keep hoping that with a lot of skin cream and the right underwear, I can contain the damage. So I bought some new knickers at Kohls - Vera Wang brand that have no band around the legs. And I wore them today and they were very comfortable! And since I cannot wear a thong - seriously, I have tried numerous times but they are just very distracting all day for me - I will put my stamp of endorsement on these Vera Wang panties that promise no panty lines. So, head to Kohls and bring on the white capri pants, and to those of you without cellulite - let this be a word of encouragement to you.